My Third Cycle and, Hopefully, A Roundhouse Kick to Cancer's Face
Wow, it's been awhile since I posted a blog. I guess I've been busy with my cancerous lifestyle, you know, chilling at da treatment center wit mah homies, chillin at home wit mah puppy, paintin and shit. No, just kidding. I went up to Ithaca for a bit and hung out with some of my friends. The last time I enjoyed myself like that I was running up my rugby team's bar tab at Level B (side note: so sad I'm missing formal this semester). I got into Ithaca just in time for my friend's 21st birthday and fishbowls at Level B (because Level B is just so classy), and I flew through the night on the wings of sobriety. I was blessed with the opportunity of watching my friends trade in their good judgment for blue raspberry koolaid mixed with vodka. Later on, after enough fishbowls are chugged and too much money is spent on alcohol, the dancing usually begins. This is my favorite part because you can always spot the girl who is way too drunk and probably too young to be in a bar. This time...oh let me tell you, THIS TIME, that girl had toilet paper stuck to her boot. And she was dancing her crazy ass all over the place. This made for an easy transition back into the college life. So I spent my night living vicariously through the drunk girl with toilet paper stuck to her boot.
Now to what it was really like being back at school for almost a week. For my friends who have taken semesters off before, I hope this is something you can relate to, and maybe we can bond about it over a beer later. Well, to be quite honest, being back at school was weird. I felt like a guest in my own home. I've really grown to love Cornell, and having been away from it for so long has been extremely tough. I didn't really expect that my visit would feel completely normal, but I also didn't think that it would be as hard as it was. As odd as it sounds, I don't think my battle with cancer really hit me until I was back on the Hill, attending class with a couple of my friends. Wow, that makes me sound like the biggest nerd ever. Let me clarify, I was attending class because I showed up in Ithaca in the middle of the week--it was either that or hang out with Netflix for a day. So, I got to U.S. Healthcare Systems, and not only did I decide that I want to take that class next fall, but I also decided that cancer sucks. Cancer took from me a semester that I had rightfully earned. All of these college kids showed up to this 200/300 lecture all giddy and excited about their weekend plans and there I am wishing I didn't have to spend the next few weeks of my life in a treatment center. If you haven't already guessed, cancer really does suck, and speaking as a young adult with cancer, I feel betrayed by my body. My body, which is supposed to work with me, has been working against me and brought me here: cancer. Now that all of my readers have closed this blog due to a very whiney cancer patient who won't stop whining because she thinks she has a right to just whine, whine, whine, I will move on...
My real reason for visiting Ithaca was to celebrate some of my favorite traditional events with my teammates. Saturday night was Jock Jams. This party is only for the elite, and by that I mean, if you don't show up in a good costume you might as well just go home and cry yourself to sleep. So naturally, I showed up in full-body, green spandex. Yes, you guessed it! I was Charlie Kelly's Greenman from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, my new obsession. Well, actually my new obsession is Grand Theft Auto V, but that's for another blog post.
This is Greenman performing Blue Steel from the movie, Zoolander
This is Greenman with friends, Lee (left) and Sam (right). Fun fact: Sam will be doing cancer research and earning her Masters in Oncology at Oxford next year. According to Sam, I inspired her to choose that path, and I will, from now on, take all of the credit for her achievements. YOU'RE WELCOME, SAM!
On Sunday was our annual Rugby Thanksgiving Dinner. The day where we force all of our rookies to prepare a wonderful Thanksgiving feast and I sit on the couch and make fun of everyone and everything. And that's exactly what I did. It was just like old times. The only difference was that now that I have cancer, I was no longer an "asshole" for not helping. I plan on milking this cancer thing every single second until I am in remission.
This is the team with all of the food we made. Surprisingly, not every dish is featured in the above photo.
Speaking of remission, I find out the results of my alpha-fetoprotein level within the next few days. If you saw in my last post, my level was 14 and I need that number to go down to 0. If I only have to do 3 cycles, then my last day of treatment will be December 10. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS....just in time for the holidays! I'm already thinking about all of the wine I'm going to drink once I'm finished with chemo.
For the remainder of this blog post, I would like to pretend that I am a wise, experienced, young woman and give some advice to my readers. Here it goes...
1. Choose your friends wisely. You never know when a study Sunday turns into an all-nighter in the Emergency Room and you need people to take care of business while you battle cancer.
2. Let yourself relax. After having spent 3 years at Cornell and working pretty much every single second of every single day, relaxing isn't an action that is often performed. And when it is performed, you can bet your ass you'll feel incredibly guilty about it. So when I started this semester with nothing to do, I kind of panicked. A couple months later and relaxing is all I do! Actually, I don't know how I'm going to make it through the spring semester because I'm pretty sure I don't know how to read anymore. Nonetheless, everyone needs time to themselves if they want to be successful.
3. Write blogs. The thought of starting a blog crossed my mind early on in treatment, but it wasn't until I met my 19-year old fellow cancer patient, Mike Judge, in the treatment center that I thought seriously about publicly sharing my journey. Now, I'm less than a dozen posts in and I have more than 10,000 views. Pretty amazing, if you ask me. Check out Mike's story here: http://thebiggestgame.blogspot.com
Okay, I've decided to save the rest of my advice for later posts/I've run out of advice because I've actually learned nothing about life from this experience. BUT STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT MY NEW ALPHA-FETOPROTEIN LEVEL. I hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving!
Now to what it was really like being back at school for almost a week. For my friends who have taken semesters off before, I hope this is something you can relate to, and maybe we can bond about it over a beer later. Well, to be quite honest, being back at school was weird. I felt like a guest in my own home. I've really grown to love Cornell, and having been away from it for so long has been extremely tough. I didn't really expect that my visit would feel completely normal, but I also didn't think that it would be as hard as it was. As odd as it sounds, I don't think my battle with cancer really hit me until I was back on the Hill, attending class with a couple of my friends. Wow, that makes me sound like the biggest nerd ever. Let me clarify, I was attending class because I showed up in Ithaca in the middle of the week--it was either that or hang out with Netflix for a day. So, I got to U.S. Healthcare Systems, and not only did I decide that I want to take that class next fall, but I also decided that cancer sucks. Cancer took from me a semester that I had rightfully earned. All of these college kids showed up to this 200/300 lecture all giddy and excited about their weekend plans and there I am wishing I didn't have to spend the next few weeks of my life in a treatment center. If you haven't already guessed, cancer really does suck, and speaking as a young adult with cancer, I feel betrayed by my body. My body, which is supposed to work with me, has been working against me and brought me here: cancer. Now that all of my readers have closed this blog due to a very whiney cancer patient who won't stop whining because she thinks she has a right to just whine, whine, whine, I will move on...
My real reason for visiting Ithaca was to celebrate some of my favorite traditional events with my teammates. Saturday night was Jock Jams. This party is only for the elite, and by that I mean, if you don't show up in a good costume you might as well just go home and cry yourself to sleep. So naturally, I showed up in full-body, green spandex. Yes, you guessed it! I was Charlie Kelly's Greenman from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, my new obsession. Well, actually my new obsession is Grand Theft Auto V, but that's for another blog post.
Well it looks like December 10th will be big days for the both of us. As long as your alpha-fetoprotein level gets to 0 that is. It'll be your last day of treatment, and the day of my surgery to get the tumor out of my arm. That number has got to be 0 though. I mean it was only 14 before, and that chemo is vicious stuff lol. I'll be praying for good results!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the shoutout btw.